Ask Commander Tendo

This whimsical piece was an idea I'd had for years, and it was a special delight to actually get to realize it. The fact that I made it into a tongue-in-cheek teaser for a new story made it all the sweeter. I posted it to LiveJournal at http://celamowari.livejournal.com/321493.html on May 17, 2007. Need I add that this one should be considered "non-canonical", even by ROJ standards?

 

Ask Commander Tendo

A special advice column in which I, Supreme Commander Ryu Tendo of Skyforce, answer questions submitted by you, the readers.






Our first letter arrived via time warp from 1993 in a special capsule stamped "If unclaimed, please return to Command Center".

Dear Commander Tendo,

I just recently joined up with the other Rangers, and it's great! Way, way better than being evil, though I seem to be getting beaten up a lot. That's part of why I'm writing. I am constantly losing my morpher, misplacing it, etc. What should I do? Also, I think I have a crush on one of my teammates. Is that wrong?
--T.O., Angel Grove, CA


Dear T.O.,

Your henshin bracelet is your most important possession! Never let it out of your sight, even if you are practicing karate forms. This is just common sense, son, because you never know if that innocent-looking man, woman, child, dog, or vending machine is secretly a monster in disguise.

Love between two sentai teammates is a perfectly natural thing, and I see nothing wrong with it. However, be prepared for the possibility of being punched in the face by one of your fellow members.

***

Our next submission is not technically a question. Rather, it is a message which was burned into the ground of my front yard. I have transcribed it here.

MONGOL EMPIRE MUST FALL! JETMAN MUST DIE! NEMESIS RULES!
--D.D., location unknown


Dear D.D.,

I am not one to judge a person's character based solely on their writing, but you strike me as someone who needs to be shot with a very large cannon.

***

Our last question this time comes from a faithful reader who claims to be writing for the first time ever.

Dear Commander Tendo,

I am a big fan of the "Return of Jetman" website! I am going crazy waiting for the next episode! Do you have any idea when it will be coming out? Also, would you mind plugging my website in your column?
--P.S., www.igadevil.com


Dear P.S.,

I share in your frustration over the lengthy delays in the ROJ saga. However, my sources tell me that the next episode will definitely premiere on May 29th, 2007. Mark your calendars now!

Your request for a plug is reasonable, but I have a standing rule never to link to websites that are run by former Shocker kaijin.

***

That's all for this installment of "Ask Commander Tendo". If you have any questions which you would like answered, please feel free to leave a comment.